This Retrograde Sucks But It Can Totally Be Good For You

I used to laugh at people who believed the a retrograde could have such a strong impact. I don’t hide the fact that I was ignorant, and probably still am in many ways. Our journey of spiritual growth is unique to each of us. It’s with that in mind that I share the following information for you.

I’m going to talk about how you can turn any retrograde you experience into something beneficial for you. I’ll reference the current retrogrades (I’m writing this on July 9th, 2018) because it’s important for those who read this in our current ‘now.’ But most of the article will serve you in turning the discomfort of a retrograde into a powerful tool for your spiritual growth.

WTF is a retrograde, anyway?

I love this question because I never really knew the details when I first heard the term. A retrograde is a time when the energy of a planet impacts you. That’s the nutshell version.

Here’s a quick list of retrograde facts that I feel are good tidbits to remember:

  • People recognize retrogrades because visually the planet appears to spin in its opposite direction
  • The opposite spin happens because of a change in the speed of the planets
  • Yes, earth does the same thing
  • Each planet/star impacts you differently than another
  • Multiple planets/stars can retrograde at the same time

There are various ways to describe the change in speed of a planet. Most people will say the cause is the planet’s elliptical path around the sun. You know what, I’ll just give you a gif because writing it out is going to suck. I’m not a scientist.

The Retrograde Path

You can see the part of the path of the other planet where it appears to go in reverse. It’s just an optical illusion based on the relative position of the planets.

That’s good right?! It means it’s nothing special! It means it’s all in your head when the emergency announcements of mercury in retrograde sound. You have nothing to worry about!

Oh, honey. The retrograde affects us all.

Let’s take the full moon as an example. Everyone knows the moon impacts the waves of the ocean. It’s the gravitational pull that does it, in case you were wondering. I just googled it for you. You’re made up of about 70% water. You don’t believe the moon, which impacts every large body of water, won’t have an impact on you? It does. Statistically, hospitals are busier, police departments are busier, and random unexpected events happen on full moons.

Let’s expand on this a little. What if the moon was larger? It’d have a stronger impact on us. What if it was larger, but further? Maybe the impact would be more subtle, but it would still be there! This is what happens with planets in retrograde. The energy they emit is stronger, but since they’re further apart, the impacts are more subtle.

What does a retrograde do to me then?

Two or three years ago I would’ve said, “nothing. It’s superstition.”

Six or Seven years ago I would’ve said, “It gives you a reason to drink. Chug! Chug! Chug!” Sometimes I miss college…

But today I have a lot more insight. Retrogrades will impact you different based on the planet in retrograde and what sign it’s in. First, let’s talk about that sign thing.

Jupiter in Scorpio Example

Tomorrow (July 10, 2018) marks the end of the current retrograde, Jupiter in Scorpio. That means that if you looked up to find Jupiter, the Scorpio constellation would be directly behind it. That’s it. Easy right?!

The reason this is important is because if the retrograde is in your astrological sign, you’ll feel the energy slightly more than everyone else. So if you’re a Leo, prepare yourself for the Mercury retrograde from July 26th, 2018 – August 19th, 2018.

Now I’m going to talk a little bit about this Jupiter retrograde because it’s important. There’s two types of experiences people are having during this retrograde.

Group 1

If the last few months (starting about March, 2018) your life has been amazing, you’re in group 1. Everything, or mostly everything, is going your way. You’re high on life! Woo-fucking-hoo! You don’t get how other people are struggling because life has been great to you. When you go to sleep you’re happy with life.

Group 2

If the last few months have totally sucked for you, you’re in group 2. It’s okay. I’m in group 2. The degree to which your life has sucked depends on the person and their spiritual growth. For some people it’s been really hard and, well, they may have taken their own life in an attempt to end the suffering. Other people just go to sleep hoping not to wake up.

Some go to sleep glad the day is finally over and hoping they wake up to a magically better life. As if Harry Potter waved his wand and shouted “vita reparo!” When they wake up, it might be to the results of Ron Weasley’s wand backfiring on him and your life is still in shambles.

How the end of this retrograde will impact you

For group 1 people, strap in. The magical experiences you’ve had are about to stop. It’s almost going to be like the withdrawal of ecstasy. Where as your life was an electric light orchestra before, you now live in a world of black, white, and blandness.

Be strong, because mercury retrograde is coming in a few weeks and you need to be ready mentally and emotionally to make it through. You can do it.

For group 2 people, enjoy the shift. The next few weeks are going to be pretty amazing compared to the last few months. It’s going to feel like some cloud just lifted and the sun is finally shining down on you. Just remember, you need to prepare for the upcoming retrograde also.

I am always ready!

How to make every retrograde work for you

What’s the purpose of a retrograde, just to fuck shit up? That’s a negative, Star Command. Everything that happens in your life is somehow created by you or is here to serve you. You can react with immaturity and a victim mentality, or you can be proactive and adult-the-fuck-up.

If you want the first option, get off this site – you’re not going to like me. If you want to make every retrograde work for you so your life continues to get better despite how crappy the world can be, read on!

During non-retrograde times, you do things like meditate and yoga to strengthen your spiritual self, your connection to your higher-self, to God, to whatever. That’s great. When you’re having a bad time you can do more grounding meditations, chants, sound bowl sessions, or whatever you do to fix the energy around you. Fantastic. Don’t take the same actions during retrograde though.

See, there’s a lot of bullshit, airy-fairy, ‘divine love’ pushing, spiritual “gurus” out there who don’t know what the fuck they’re talking about. They’ll tell you to do more of what you do during non-retrograde times. If you want to have a bad time, follow their suggestions.

It’s like working out when you’re sick. It’s not going to get you the results you’re looking for. It might even lead to you getting more sick because you’re strategically breaking your body down and there’s not enough cellular energy to fight your sickness and rebuild your muscles.

What’s happening to you during the retrograde

A retrograde is such a blessing. It’s showing you, and giving you the opportunity to connect, to your ego. We all have an ego. We all have parts of our ego we hide from ourselves and others. Retrograde put that shit on full display.

I think there’s a Hindu analogy about retrogrades where the world around you is like a mirror, and when a retrograde occurs, the mirror is covered in dust and dirt. The BS spiritual guru’s are essentially telling you to blow on the mirror to get the dust off. The dust then lands directly on you and now you’re dirty.

Your goal is to clean the mirror so your reflection is clear again.

Clear the mirror of the retrograde and see yourself clearly.

That’s done by connecting to your ego! Your ego is a part of you. Ignoring it completely can lead to major problems. Recognizing it as part of what contributes to who you are, and being okay with that, is how the retrograde serves you.

When the world around you is falling apart, your life is in shambles, and nothing is going your way – your ego is going to react. Recognizing this and being okay with your ego is the best thing you can do. This recognition and acceptance takes away its power and control. You then have a brief moment, a small space, to consciously respond instead of having your instinctual reaction.

Your reward for doing this

The end result? You are ok. Yeah. That’s the reward. You’re ok. But stop and recognize what that really means for a second. You’re ok! You’re not bad. You’re not suffering. You’re not a waste of life. You might be an asshole on occasion. A bitch to someone who didn’t deserve it. Doesn’t matter. You’re ok!

Coming to terms with what the retrograde is showing you helps you be ok no matter what disasters surround you. Imagine being in the worst possible situation and still being ok!

What can you do to make this happen

You can do whatever feels right. Keep meditating, sure. But instead of having the intention to experience some magical connection to your higher-self, use the meditation to connect to your ego. Let it’s emotions and thoughts run through you. Recognize them, accept that they are there. Accept that they are a part of you. And do whatever it takes to be okay with them.

That’s not the same as doing more of whatever you normally do. It’s doing what you might normally do in a completely different way. If you do float tanks or salt baths, set different intentions. Set the intentions to gather greater clarity as to how that session will serve you. As to how the retrograde can help you. Think about all the crap you’re dealing with and set the intention that whatever you do helps you work through it the right way.

Ignore the advice that doesn’t help you.

Most people will hear the BS guru’s I’m talking about and know the last thing they want to do is follow that advice but they do it anyway because they thing this other person knows better. I’m telling you they don’t. There might be times where I don’t have the right answers either. I’m not perfect. I’m still growing. But I finally made it to a point where as bad as this past retrograde was for me, I’m okay. And knowing there’s people that’ve taken their lives during this time reminds me that being okay might be the best thing I could hope for.

If something in this article resonated with you, or you have a question, feel free to let me know! I’m easy to find.

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